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In today’s reading we went back to Proverbs for a reminder that Solomon was blessed by God with wisdom. There are so many golden nuggets within these two chapters. If there were a theme or a key verse, a good choice would be Proverbs 25:11,

"…a word spoken in right circumstances."

When we choose our words wisely, life will be sweeter. This reminds me of another proverb earlier in the book: A gentle answer turns away wrath. There are words and actions that we can practice that will make our life experience much more peaceful and satisfying.

We see this positive overcoming the negative in Proverbs 25:21–22—two verses I highlighted as a reminder to practice this counter-cultural approach,

“If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink; for you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you.”

Feed your enemy. Give them water. … Not the natural response... but the right one.

Everything in us wants the opposite. We want the score settled. But Solomon guides us elsewhere, to a plate of food and a cup of water, handed to the very person who is hurting us.

And then we come to that familiar but strange phrase: Burning coals... on his head.

Many people have read this as cloaked revenge; kill him with kindness, and quietly enjoy the sizzle. That's not it. The image may reach back to an old practice of carrying a pan of live coals on the head as a public sign of a changed heart... repentance you could actually see. Even if this is not the picture, the coals aren't our vengeance. Our kindness isn't meant to wound him but to soften him.

The apostle Paul explains this proverb. He quotes it almost word for word in Romans 12:20, and makes it clear that it’s not cloaked revenge. He wrote in verse 21,

"Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."

Certainly pouring unexpected searing hot scarring coals on one's head could not be good. And verse 19 makes it clear that we are not to heap punishment on anyone to balance the scales when he writes,

“Never take your own revenge... 'Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,' says the Lord.”

The coals were never meant for us to cause injury. Our responsibility is to show grace even to our enemies. We hand over the need for revenge and let God handle the fire, leaving us free from the second guessing that comes from acting unkindly.

A clear conscience is a guilt and shame free life; I believe that is part of the reward God promises in Proverbs. We may never see our enemy soften. They may never repent this side of heaven. That’s not our assignment. Our reward doesn't hang on their response. It is found in our obedience… and in El Roi, the God who sees what no one else did, and is pleased.

Takeaway: Feed your enemy. Shut the door on that nagging inner voice… the one that whispers you went too far, that you owe the apology, that you handled it wrong. Do the hard, holy thing. Give bread. And trust God with the rest.