Developing Love

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. — 1 Corinthians 13:4–7

You might be thinking that this is an strange passage to choose for an Advent devotional; especially one for Christmas morning. And yet, I see in the little baby in that stable—God in flesh—a human being, so dependent on others for His future development. He needed nourishment, protection, and even life lessons. God needed life lessons! What a wild thought. But the fact is that God chose to enter our reality as a helpless babe and needed the help of those more developed who could love Him as described here.

We all need that kind of help when we stop and think about it. I often think of our journey to spiritual maturity as a path that we are all walking along—the same path. Some people are further along than we are, others are just beginning and therefore are further back on territory we’ve already covered, and then there are those who are in step with us on our journey. It can seem easier or more comfortable to walk with those who are at the same “mile marker,” experiencing similar struggles. But there will certainly be times when it is more difficult to walk alongside them, because their struggles are our struggles, which can result in frustration when we have not yet developed to the degree needed to love each other well.

Interacting with those who are a ways behind us can be a maturing experience in and of itself. This is when our love needs to be patient and kind—not arrogant, not unbecoming, not easily provoked, and not holding on to the wrongs they may cause in our lives. We are able to extend that kind of love to those who are struggling in areas we once struggled with ourselves but have since grown through. One thing that helps me remain patient and kind is remembering what a pain in the butt I once was and the grace shown to me by more mature believers who extended patience to me.

One of the discipleship disciplines impressed upon me early on was the importance of having more mature believers in my life—those who were, and still are, further along the path than I am. I have had older, more mature saints whom I’ve turned to when I needed advice. I’ve chosen them to speak into my life because I’ve seen their patience and kindness, their desire to live by biblical truth, their forgiveness, their strong faith in a secure and good future, and the way they have endured their share of difficulties and emerged on the other side. Surrounding myself with proven and trusted saints has been an incredible benefit to my ongoing process of maturing.

As you move past Christmas and into the New Year—perhaps taking inventory and making resolutions—consider where you are on the path of spiritual maturity. Who can you help that is further behind you? Rather than viewing them as a source of frustration, see them as an opportunity to pay back what others have graciously done for you. Then consider those who can help you as you move forward. Look for mature saints who are willing to invest in you as you continue along the path toward spiritual maturity.

So, maybe this passage is not such a strange choice for Christmas Day after all. The miracle of the incarnation is not only that God came to us, but that He chose to grow among us. He entrusted Himself to the patient, imperfect love of others. In the same way, our growth in Christ is shaped within relationships where love is practiced, tested, and refined. On Christmas morning, as we celebrate God’s love made flesh, may we also commit ourselves to living out that love beyond the day, into the journey of our lives. Let’s patiently give it to those who need it and humbly receive it from those who help us grow.